I'll never forget the night she broke the news to me. It was September 28th, 2009. After a long day, I pulled into our garage ready to unwind. I walked in, laid my briefcase on top of the dryer, kicked off my shoes, hung up my jacket. "Hey!" I called out, to greet my wife, but she didn't respond. "She must be putting the boys down," I thought.
I walked into the family room, and sat down on the couch, in my spot. I turned on the television, and started flipping through channels to see if anything worthwhile was on.
Then she walked in. "Hey babe," she said. She seemed a little tired, like we always were after a long day.
"They down?" I asked.
"Yeah."
Normally she had more to say, but that night she was mellow. She looked a little sad. I could tell something was wrong, but, I wasn't sure if it was wrong enough for me to bring it up.
She then came and sat down, on the floor, right in front of me, and just stared at me. "Okay," I said to myself, "she wants to talk." So I asked, "Babe, is everything okay?"
She just handed it to me. I had seen one or two of them before, but it's not like seeing them ever gets old. It was a pregnancy stick. My eyes widened as I studied it. Alice didnt' say a word. She just sat there studying my face to see how I would respond.
I couldn't believe it. We had already decided that we were done having kids. Two boys were enough. Christopher was barely 9 months old, and Manuel was only 1-and-a-half. They were both still in diapers. Sure we wanted a little girl, but the stress of raising two baby boys was more than enough. I was working full time at a church, and speaking around the country, sometimes up to thirty times a week. Alice also had a full-time job as a chemist. So when we got home from work, we were both exhausted. We both needed a break. We both wanted to just relax. But we couldn't, because we had two boys to enjoy, to spend time with, to raise.
Our schedules had taken their toll on our marriage. We barely had any time to connect with one another, as roomates, business partners, or otherwise.
So when she handed me that pregnancy stick, I stared at it for several seconds, and all I could say in that moment as I looked up at her was, "Again?"
"Yep," she said with a heaviness. She didn't say it, but it was like she said, "We've had a hard time with two; what's gonna happen to us with three?"
Even though I felt all of her concern in her terse, "yep," I honestly didn't worry in that moment about how much more stress another child would put on our marriage.
No. When I saw that little plus sign, I felt hopeful. "Maybe this is our little girl," I said. As she crawled up into my arms, and we embraced each other, I reassured her, "we're gonna be alright."
3 years later, we're actually more than alright. We are happy. We are blessed. We are enjoying the journey! That little plus sign- that pregnancy stick- actually turned out to be our little girl, Berkeley.
You know the sweet irony of it all? Even though Alice wanted our third child the least, she has enjoyed our third child the most. Berkeley is Alice's little doll, with the way she does her hair at night, and they way they have a blast shopping for shoes (pray for me). They have something special, in a girl kind of way.
All that to say, Alice, as a mother, is truly amazing.
So I want to wish my dear wife, Alice, a happy mother's day. And, I need to wish my mother, a happy mother's day as well. I now bet she felt that sinking feeling in her stomach when she was pregnant with me, and my brothers. Furthermore, to all those women who have served as mother-figures for me, and all you mom's in the world out there who are raising the next generations of our world, I wish you a heartfelt Happy Mother's Day too.
Manny
P.S. Below is a little video of me spending quality time with my little angel, my little princess, my baby Berkeley. She has changed my life! She's given me a category that my heart or mind didn't have. If I were able to pluck a star from the heavens for every time this little girl warms my heart, I would hold in the palm of my hand the entire evening sky. I am wrapped around her pinky three times. I'm telling you now, I'm gonna be a mess when I walk her down the aisle when she's 60 years old 